I think just a little tiny bit of separation anxiety wouldn't be uncalled for

There's this kid at Drew's daycare named Jake.

I know Jake's name because every morning when I drop Drew off, I watch Jake, Jake's mom and the Daycare People go through the dance of "Distract Jake so Mommy Can Leave" - which involves frantically waving various gadgets, blankies and brightly-colored objects in front of Jake's face in a desperate effort to deter him from screaming his fool head off at the thought of his mother leaving him in this wretched torture chamber.

Jake is a little bit annoying.

However, I have to say I am the teensiest, tiniest, just a little tiny bit, mind you, jealous of Jake's mom.

Because Jake, as loud and red-faced tantrumy as he is, obviously loves his mother so much that the thought of being away from her for EIGHT WHOLE HOURS is unimaginable, unbearable and unacceptable in any sense of the word.

On the other hand, there's Drew.

We enter his room at daycare, and he immediately bestows a tremendous, gummy, love-filled grin upon the Daycare People. I place him on the floor and, he does not spare another glance at the woman who bore him for nine months while her ankles swelled up like inner tubes and she still can't fit into any of her old clothes and she still can't get a full night's sleep.

No, he is a very busy baby. There are many toys upon which to drool and many other babies at whom to stare and many Daycare People upon whom to lavish love and affection.

I am dismissed. And dammit, I don't mind saying that sometimes I'd like to see a tear or two.  Some understanding of the fact that it pains him as much to be left as it does for me to leave him.

And then I berate myself for being selfish.

One day, when I'm prying his chubby little arms from a vise-like grip from around my knees while he turns varying shades of purple and red, I will probably long for the days when I could slip out of his daycare room unnoticed.

My son obviously loves his daycare, and his Daycare People, and his toys and his classmates. So, I'm blessed, right?

Right?

Comments

[Mom]

BE GRATEFUL YOU HAVE SUCH A WELL ADJUSTED BABY THAT KNOWS YOU WILL BE BACK AND HE HAS NOTHING TO BE WORRIED ABOUT!!! If you aren't careful he will become a Jake or (if there is) the next one will not let you out of the room. (You were that way around the age of 6. It is no picnic!)

[Jan]

Yes, consider yourself lucky! Evan didn't have separation anxiety until 10 or 11 months, and let me tell you, it SUCKS. Not a good way to start a day for mommy or baby. :(

[Sam]

Drew loves you tonz and tonz! Mine was the same way...in fact, my mom and I had battles during the time when I felt he loved her more than me. (she was his daycare provider)
But I realize now that it's just how he is...he's independent and happy...and needs me, even if it's in other ways.
I know mom's whose kids are like Jake...they are always late for work and when they get there they are upset and distracted...not a good way to start the day.
But I know what you mean...it's part of the working mom dilema...there's no cure except to go kiss your sleeping child on his soft cheek and tell him that you love him.
As often as you can.

[ebeth]

mary catherine didn't get anxious until about 18 months - but it wasn't too bad. she's never been sad to stay at nursery and i know exactly how you feel. but i think it's much easier and definitely a positive thing. wait until he can call your name and run to you at the end of the day - he's just too little at the moment. :)